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Feminine Energy & Patterns of Pain


It's international women's day and I am reflecting on what I am seeing as a phenomenon of feminine energy resurgence. The world, in my opinion, once knew that qualities of feminine energy were vital to a well-balanced existence. But through fear-based rejection, it had forgotten the truth.

What does it mean to be a woman? What is feminine energy?

I went to an all girls school.

All I knew was my feminine energy reflecting back at me in it's wholesomeness and greatness from peers I loved and educators I respected, .

In my schools, girls truly ran the world. Nuns or otherwise, authority was held by women we looked up-to for guidance. We took pleasure in being girls, wore our uniform with pride. We competed amongst one another knowing full well we had all it took to be the best, giggled in sewing class and played men in school plays. Some were into soccer and kicked ass in Taekwondo while others wrote poetry. None of us got teased or bullied for getting our periods, nor did we judge one another for being 'emotional'.

We may not have realized it but looking back, we were fulfilled and free. Being a young woman surrounded by feminine energy was amazing! It had the power to validate.

Well, that should've made me a fierce woman from the get go. Right? But I wasn't. Not until I located and dealt with some pain. Personal and collective. Pain that stems from a rejected self.

I was a young girl when I started noticing that my all-girls fancy Catholic school sampling was far from the reality of what it meant to be a woman. Merging with the real world after graduating high school would confirm my suspicion.

You see, there was a contrasting image to womanhood in my family. There were too many examples to count, of women with un-lived potentials, deeply embedded scars, unresolved trauma. My mom harbored a lot of guilt of having sacrificed her dreams to raise 7 kids. Hidden guilt that was paradoxically vivid in frequent displays of discontentment. Myself and most of my siblings would marinate in that energy, in turn exhibit resentment towards it and towards themselves.

Women with wounded spirits roamed free In my immediate and extended family too. A man or a system of beliefs had sold them short, abused them or both. Their pain manifested itself in conflict, both within themselves and inevitably with life and those around them.

It wasn't just us, I would later find out.

I started noting patterns of pain in families, communities and nations that disregarded feminine energy. By suppressing transparency, belittling the art of sensitivity and undermining the mastery of intuition, humankind has spent centuries not only losing the benefits of feminine power but also accumulating pain felt by women being told it's 'weak' or 'bad' to be who they are. That pain gets passed down to new generations by mothers who fail to be present with it and instead react to discomfort, displaying superficial toughness they were taught to favor to the soulful stillness that is their might. Since through faced agony happens to be the only way out, avoided emotional ills gets passed from mother to children.

So it continues, unless the pattern is broken.

The girl my family raised would survive far longer than the one my schools shaped because she was tossed into the same world that denied it's femininity, deeming it weak. A world that favored and even celebrated toughness while shunning sensitivity, vulnerability and the acceptance of having emotions.

As easy as it is to avoid, deny and run away, healing dwells in being present with pain itself. The more of us embark in this rewarding adventure, patterns of suffering have no option but to yield to positive transformation.

Now is an exciting time to be a woman! The world looks like it's slowly overcoming it's fear of the truth and making amends with the feminine energy it rejected as vital for too long. We are waking up everyday to a woman who is using her voice to embrace who she is and allowing for others to do the same. Many are defeating shame and speaking out about their stories of assault and abuse, reclaiming their power. Most are unapologetically curious about inner climates and bold enough to go on an authentic journey of soul-search , awareness and self-mastery.

We are seeing men and women value emotional intelligence, rejecting the long-held misconception that feelings are for the faint-hearted.

I hope you see it too. Not just see it but be a part of it. Man or woman, may your curiosity take you inwards into the part of you that knows to be still and fight from the fierceness of its femininity.

The world can only be a better place for it.

prove that reality.

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